Inside sources have provided further detail on Scott Morrison’s rumoured new role at a UK defence company, saying the former PM will provide specialist advice for submarine developers on how to avoid detection and then vanish into thin air at the first sign of trouble.
A source at the company said Morrison was highly skilled at suddenly becoming invisible when things went wrong. “Scott has some of the most advanced in-built avoidance technology we’ve encountered, so we’re looking forward to applying those learnings to our submarines, as well as our fighter jets,” the source said.
“I can imagine a situation where one of our subs comes under fire in Chinese waters and then seconds later re-materialises in Hawaii. That’s the sort of technology we think Scott can help us develop”.
He said Morrison’s ability to blend into any given setting will also be useful in developing camouflage technology. “The guy moved from Eastern Sydney to the Shire and within seconds was wearing Sharkies gear and eating meat pies. If we can get our fighter jets to change stripes as quickly as Morrison does, they’ll be indestructible”.
Asked whether he had accepted the defence role, Morrison said “It’s not my job”, although it is uncertain whether that was a genuine answer to the question, or a reflex response.
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