After enduring a two-year court-battle that revealed truly horrific detail about his time in the Middle East, former Aussie soldier and all-round family man Ben Roberts-Smith has suddenly remembered that he was actually the fucking idiot who started all of this.
In an interview after today’s verdict, Ben Roberts-Smith explained how he had totally forgotten that he’d ripped apart his reputation voluntarily.
“So I’m standing there, trying to come to terms with the judge’s statement – the war crimes, the murders and all that horrific shit. And I’m thinking, fuck, I’m going to get twenty years behind bars for this. And then I think, hang on a second, this is a defamation trial, not a criminal trial, I can’t go to jail. And I’m not even the one on trial. Yay me.
“But I’m still pissed, because this thing has totally ruined me. And so I start cursing the absolute dipshit who had the nerve to start these court proceedings in the first place. And my lawyer turns to me and says, ‘Um, Ben you started it mate, remember? You’re the fuckhead’.
“And I’m like ‘really? Why the hell would someone voluntarily put themselves through this? What sort of God complex would you need to have to do that?’ Elite soldier. More like elite fucking idiot.
“Anyway, I’m going to sue the judge for defamation. So I better start preparing for that case”.
The post Ben Roberts-Smith Suddenly Remembers He Initiated This Fucking Trial appeared first on The Shovel.
