Economists have raised serious concerns that the Sydney housing market may be completely out of control this week, after auction prices hit a new high price of 3 rapid tests and a JPEG of a monkey.
“It’s completely out of control,” exclaimed one house investor struggling to afford their 12th appartment. “I’ve avoided avocado toast for years and somehow property has only gotten more unaffordable in that time. And don’t even get me started on the rapid tests. Who would have thought that this government would refuse to address a shortage of an essential item?”
However not everyone was so unfortunate, with one lucky millennial snapping up a great bargain on a rapid test with the extremely savy investing method of having billionaire parents. “I don’t know why more people haven’t done this!” he exclaimed. “If I can do it, anyone can. Except 99% of you.”