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NSW begs other states to send their Pfizer to help vaccinate private schools (The Chaser)

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The NSW state government has today called on all other states and territories to do the right thing and hand over their excess stocks of Pfizer vaccine, to ensure that NSW has enough supplies to stop the spread of Covid within their private schools.

“It’s imperative we stop this thing before it starts affecting our rich and affluent,” explained the Premier today. “Locking down the western suburbs is one thing, but if one rich donor in the east is told they can’t hang out at Bondi Junction for a week there’s going to be hell rained on us.”

However, the state has clarified that it won’t only be private schools getting the jab, stating such a thing would be “unconscionable”. “We’ll also be giving Pfizer to Gerry Harvey’s mates,” clarified Gladys. “We’re not monsters after all.”

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